Life Update: Marriage and Weight Gain

As the title suggests, this is both a positive and kick up the bum post.

I need to get it out or I’ll explode. So first the good; I GOT MARRIED!

WOOOOOOO! After nearly 9 years I finally got hitched to Mr Fisher and I could not be happier.

Here are just a few pics of the amazing day.

It was a wonderful day and soo many people came.

And now the not so good.

I am really struggling with this healthy living lark.

In the lead up to the wedding I had something to aim for because I needed to make sure I could fit into my dress but I had been struggling for a while if I’m being honest with myself.

Firstly, this has nothing to do with quitting Slimming World as that was making me miserable; that was obsessing TOO MUCH about the scales, which isn’t healthy either in my opinion.

I know living healthy will help me live longer but something just isn’t clicking for the long-term in my brain at the moment.

At the weekend,we did our weekly shop and along with all the typical salad that is a regular in my trolley now, we picked up some indian starters, not just 1 or 2,4 different varieties and about 6 of each. Then I fancied one of those packs of mediterranean meats; you know the ones that have fat in them like serrano ham and such like. So I grabbed a huge pack because they were the only ones that had variety and because we had that, we got a pizza to put some of the meat on. (I NEVER BUY PIZZA IN THE SUPERMARKET)

I feel like I’m losing control of my ability to say no, or my ability to balance out the bad with the good. I was pretty good last week because when I’m at work, I have routine, but it gets to Friday and its like I let my cares disappear and shovel whatever I can in my mouth.

I feel like if Lee’s having something, then I want it too because I don’t want to miss out. I HATE MISSING OUT,especially when it comes to food.

I know I should draw a line under it and enjoy those little wobbles because life is about balance, but I can see my body shape changing and not for the better. 😦

I’ve worked so frigging hard but it seems to be getting really hard for me to keep my healthy food in check.

My little sister is joining Slimming World with my mum on Wednesday, so I’m hoping they can give me some motivation because I don’t want to go back up into the next stone bracket because I’ll feel like I’ve failed.

I’m trying not to use the scales too much but I need to get over myself and see what the damage is, and take my measurements again to see where I am with things.

I need help. How do you get back on it if your brain has basically given up and every time anyone offers you anything remotely naughty,you say yes straight away.

PLEASE HELP, I am seriously struggling :((

SIMW

xx

Weigh Day Wednesday 22/7/15

Hi there lovelies,hope you’re well.

This week has not been fantastic in terms of food yet again (god I feel like a broken record) because I have made 3 terrible meal choices.

Friday– I had Chinese because me and Lee were drinking.

Saturday– I went to a wedding do and me and Lee went for an Indian as a late anniversary ( I’m allowing this one).

Sunday– Had no breakfast and went for KFC at about 4pm.

None of this screams health nut!My problem is that I cave too easily when Lee suggests something or sometimes I push for a takeaway because I can’t be bothered.In the beginning I had loads of motivation but it seems to have subsided and I hate that.

Nobody’s perfect,I get that…but I’ve come this far,so why am I sabotaging myself?!

This week I knew I had put on because I could feel it.I weighed in at:

  …so that’s a gain of 1.5 lb.

I’m fed up of the fluctuation now and I know my weakness is the weekend because I can’t be bothered to cook. I’m not blaming anyone but myself because I can always say no if Lee suggests a takeaway but that’s it now.I need some time away from takeaways because I always have great weeks at work then completely ruin it Friday through Sunday.

This Friday I’m going down south for a works office party.I can’t drink a lot anyway because I have to travel back on the Saturday and I think it will be a barbecue so I’ll be careful with the food.

I’m going back on Myfitnesspal until I’m back on track and then on the 1st August (or maybe a bit before) I’ll be joining the new gym so hopefully that will help.I’ll be back with my mum after a long while so let’s hope catching up with her will help spur me on with my eating choices.

I don’t want you guys to think I’m failing you but right now I’m struggling because I’m not preparing for the weekend.Thursday night I should prep a fakeaway so there is no temptation when I’ve had a drink because the last thing I want to do on a Friday is a lot of food prep!

Hoping for a better week next week and hoping I can get back on an even keel.I truly hope you guys are all making fab food choices and smashing  your weight loss goals.

Enjoy the rest of your week lovelies!

SIMW

X

Weigh Day Wednesday 10/6/15

Good morning lovelies. 

So this week I have had a gain of 1lb and 3/4,so nearly 2lb. I’m not happy about that but a conversation with my gym instructor last night put it all in perspective.

He said, ‘It’s not all about the weight loss or that number on the scales.When people see you,they don’t ask how much you weigh,they say you look good.As long as you look good and feel healthier then that’s all that matters.’

He’s so right! Throughout these blog posts, I mention on occasion that body positivity should be celebrated and we shouldn’t obsess about that number on the scales, but that’s exactly what I’ve been doing!I have been mad obsessed about getting into the next stone bracket and have lost sight of how healthy I feel now.

My body has changed so much;some for the better and some for the not so better but I need to love my body for what it is. I should love my now saggy boobs and loose skin on my stomach,not hate it.

I have got to a point now where I look almost normal in a crowd of people and not that really fat girl who needs extra room.I think my perception of my body is that it’s a lot bigger because I’ve been big all my life and I suppose I still picture bigger Tasha sometimes. Like I said last week, when I look in the mirror,the person I see is slimmer than I think I am.I know that sounds completely nuts but it’s true.

Maybe I need some image therapy or something to get into my head just how different I look.

I posted this picture on my social media earlier this week:

   which caused a lot of people to say, ‘Wow Tasha seeing it like that really shows your weight loss’. I think it’s because my weight loss has been gradual over about 15 months and close friends and family have seen me often enough to get used to the ‘new me’.

So this next week,although I am going to aim for a loss,I’m going to take my measurements again to see the difference there and actually take time to appreciate my body and how I feel.I need to create a bit of body confidence in myself and love myself a bit more. Hopefully I can obsess a bit less and see where that takes me!

Hope this blog post was helpful to you and it just shows that even the weight gains are important in a journey to live healthier. They remind you that the little number on the scales is not the end of the world.

Love you guys

SIMW

Weigh day Wednesday 29/4/15

Hi there lovelies!Sorry for not posting yesterday.I sort of got a bit side tracked!This week I have gained a lb…

…but it’s ok because I have really enjoyed my food this week.I had a good week up to Saturday and then went out with some old friends from school for tapas.The tapas was gorgeous but it was the cocktails that probably began to push me into my weight gain.Then I had to go down south for work for a few days so took it as an opportunity to eat crap rather than stay on the path of healthiness.

I had a vegetarian breakfast at Wetherspoons with a full fat latte.Then had biscuits in the office and later had a massive stone baked pizza that naturally was full of cheese. Then when I got back to my room,I went to the vending machine and got some choccy bars and a bag of Kettle chips. The morning after I had another latte from Costa and a cheese and onion toastie;so much cheese!

So all in all,I haven’t had the best week with food but I’m not being too hard on myself because it’s not every day I have a weekend like the one just gone and I really enjoyed it.

Also on Monday because I was down south,I couldn’t go to the gym.I was planning on doing some floor exercises in my room but I was never in it long enough before being called back out.So I missed a day’s exercise.

However, now I’m back and on it like sonic so let’s hope next week is better.I have quite a busy month ahead of me events wise (more on that later) so here’s hoping I can get some more podge off by the end of the month!

Happy Thursday lovelies,Keep going on your healthy journey!

SIMW

xx

Weigh Day Wednesday: 8/4/15-Kick up the bum

Hi guys!

This week’s weigh in went how I expected it to go…

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I put on 1.5 lb’s and up until yesterday, I was really annoyed with myself. Then I realised that being annoyed won’t get me anywhere, so I started reading and researching motivation and weight loss tips and ideas and also looking at old pictures of me when I was nearly 22 stone. Sometimes it’s important to remind yourself why you started and really think hard about how bloody difficult it was lugging around all that extra weight. When you were almost crying after a gym workout because you felt like you would have a heart attack and being strict with your food intake. That’s what I haven’t been doing.

I’ve been kidding myself that I’m working hard when really I’ve just been going through the motions and doing the bare minimum to try and not put the weight back on.

So now, after some stern words with myself, I am going to go hell for leather with both the exercise and even more importantly, the food intake. I am going to keep an eye on hidden calories in sauces, seasonings and other foods and make sure that next week is an excellent weight loss (or at least sets me back on track).

This book I started reading has been reminding me of my relationship with food and why it is so unhealthy.

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Fab book by the way!

Well not anymore! Food will be enjoyed but in portion controlled amounts and the snacking will be cut down and biscuits replaced with healthier alternatives. I stick by my rule of not denying myself everything because I know this never works and I would fall off the wagon. I will still enjoy my snacks, but have less of them.

Think it’s fair to say that Fat; I’M COMING TO GET YOU!

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IT’S NOT OVER!

SIMW

xx